Out on a Limb
A Monthly Newsletter from Martha Clark Scala
Invest in bringing joy back to your life.
October 2010
 
Welcome to Out on a Limb, a monthly newsletter from Martha Clark Scala. This free e-zine is meant to invite and inspire you to maximize the joy in your life.

MFTs, LCSWs and RNs: There is still room in A Very Full Plate!

Find out how to make room for your self even if your plate feels awfully full, on Friday, October 15th in Palo Alto, CA. Space still available to register now, or tell your colleagues about this opportunity to earn CEUs while taking care of yourself. For more info, click here!, click here!


Have Yourself a Mom-Fest

If you accept the premise that no human being is perfect, and that mothers are human beings, then you are faced with a decision:

1) You can bemoan the imperfection of your own Mom, and focus on her flaws. Moms get an awfully bad rap. Complaints about her consume some air-time in most peopleís lives.

2) You can embrace the perfection of your Mom despite her flaws. Sometimes those flaws shape our growth and development in painful ways. Who ever said growing was easy? ďA good garden may have some weeds,Ē as Thomas Fuller wrote in 1732.

3) You can increase the chances of getting all of your Mom-needs met by having a Mom-Fest. You engage in a Mom-Fest through the course of your life by first accepting your own Momís limitations. Then, you collect Mom-types who excel in areas where your own Mom is or was weak.

If you want more joy in your life, options #2 and #3 will increase the odds. So, how do you organize a Mom-Fest? You donít. It unfolds. Look back over the course of your life and identify the women, men, or animals, who mothered or nourished you. It could have been a teacher who took a special interest in you or helped you over some educational hurdle. Was it a neighbor who babysat for you, and stayed with you while you cried yourself to sleep? An athletic coach. A dorm mother or academic dean. A counselor or therapist. A nun, a sister, the older sister of a friend. The mother of a friend who taught you how to sew, bake cookies or send thank-you notes. A dear, dear friend. Your collection has accumulated throughout your life. You may not be in contact with these Moms all of the time. In fact, they may have died or disappeared. You always have access to them, in your memory, and you can always acquire more.


Mom-Searching

Mom-types are everywhere. They may be younger than you, or look very un-mother-ish. One Mom in my stash is a male who offers encouragement and endorsement like a proud Mama. Cats and other pets can make great surrogate Moms, too. You donít have to ask someone to join your Mom-Fest; if they are in some way maternal toward you, voila!

 

So Close You Can Touch Her

It is so easy to turn our attention to the outer world to find these nurturing souls. There is one Mom who is probably the most accessible. She may combine the generosity of a grandmother, the affection of a puppy, the faith expressed in you by a fabulous mentor, and the solace you have received from a confidante. She is the Mom-Fest within. Listen to her!



Your October 2010 Prompts for Joy

Click here for a very maternal message
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVQJPeRwKek

Click here for a fun rendition of Do-Re-Mi
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EYAUazLI9k

With thanks to Cheryl Richardson, and one of my favorite Moms, Carolyn Murphy. 


Joy-Gram for October 2010

Who says that Motherís Day is the only day we should thank and acknowledge the myriad Moms in our life? Pick up the phone, send an e-mail, write a thank-you note to a Mom who has made a difference in your life.

        P.S. It really might be your own mother!

Pictured Above

Nancy Halleran is a nurturing neighbor. She makes a fabulous, soothing fish chowder for grieving souls. Thank you, Nancy!

 

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Disclaimer
By no means do I have joy “figured out.” Please do not assume that I do! I write Out On a Limb as much as a meditation for myself in the ongoing pursuit of joy, as for you. I think this pursuit is a lifelong journey and that the full experience of joy is, at best, episodic. May we all have more episodes!

 

Martha Clark Scala, MFT ē 721 Colorado Ave., Suite 201, Palo Alto, CA 94303 ē
info@MCScala.com

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