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Out
on a Limb |
A
Monthly Newsletter from Martha Clark Scala |
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Invest
in bringing joy back to your life. |
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January
2008 |
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Welcome
to Out on a Limb,
a monthly newsletter from Martha Clark Scala. This free e-zine
is meant to invite and inspire you to maximize the joy in
your life.
January
2008
Taking
Risks
“For every adversity there is an equivalent seed
of benefit. You only have to look for it. Believe in yourself
and get up if you fail….” -
Evel Knievel (from his website)
Whether
you liked him or not, you probably knew who Evel Knievel
was. He died November 30, 2007 after a 3-year battle
with lung cancer. The quintessential daredevil’s
obituary states that “despite his well-known swagger
of self confidence, the legacy he wished for most of all
was simply to be an inspiration.” Think about the
people you know who are or who have taken great risks.
Evel Knievel’s risks were carried out in the public
arena but there are others whose risk-taking is more quiet
or private. What inspires you about these people? What
qualities or traits do you want to emulate? What stops
you from emulating them? Real or imagined danger or incompetency? |
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Can’t
I’m willing to bet that at some point when you consider
taking a risk, the “I can’t …” voice
gets good and loud. People who take unexpected risks to rescue
someone often do so without thinking. They just act. Is it
improper logic, then, to conclude that we might take more
risks if we did less thinking? I’m reminded of the
wise advice: “Feel the fear and do it anyway.” I’m
also reminded of the observation that “fear is excitement
without the breath.” So maybe if we breathe more,
and think less, our actions taken will bring more excitement
and joy! Don’t think about it too long, okay?
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On
the Other Hand …
If
someone encourages you to run or walk a Half-Marathon,
let’s say your first response is “I can’t.” This
may be true, especially if you have disabilities that truly
prevent you from being able to complete a test of endurance.
But often, we say “I can’t” when what
we really mean is “I won’t.” So the
next time you catch yourself saying “I can’t,” take
the time to ask yourself if this is really true. If it’s
not, discover what’s uncomfortable about saying “I
won’t.” It’s a more definitive “no,” and
there’s nothing wrong with saying no, is there? Saying “no” when
we feel the pressure to say “yes” may be a
path to joy. Try it! |
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Our
Fondness for Safety: Don’t Grab Hold of the Water
"To
have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When
you swim you don't grab hold of the water, because
if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax,
and float." ~ Alan Watts
It is not entirely ridiculous to be concerned about emotional
or physical safety! However, our fondness for safety sometimes
sets us up to be so risk-averse that it squeezes life and
vigor out of our lives. Given the choice, which would you
choose? Safe and enervated, or risk-taking (within reason)
and energized? For a variety of perspectives on the balancing
act between risk-taking and safety, click
here.
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Joy-Gram for January
In
order to work both sides of this topic: 1) Take a risk
by saying yes to something that seems scary, but potentially
thrilling. No one is exempt from failure. Confronting the
fear of failure is a universal challenge, and often worth
it, even if you don’t always succeed or get what
you want. 2) Take a risk by saying no, rather than “I
can’t,” when there’s pressure to say
yes, but your heart of hearts really says “I won’t.” |
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Disclaimer
By
no means do I have joy “figured out.” Please
do not assume that I do! I write Out On a Limb as much as
a meditation for myself in the ongoing pursuit of joy,
as for you. I think this pursuit is a lifelong journey
and that the full experience of joy is, at best, episodic.
May we all have more episodes!
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Martha Clark Scala, MFT • 721 Colorado Ave., Suite 201, Palo Alto, CA 94303 •
info@MCScala.com
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